Personality or Choice?

Do you believe that what you do is a result of who you are? That ‘you are who you are’ and that is it? Maybe that you have to find your true self to understand why you behave the way you do? And that being yourself is always the right thing?

This means you believe in a fixed personality. That you are set in stone. Which can be comforting emotionally because it reduces uncertainty. But it makes you literally a robot.

If you believe you have a fixed personality, then you have no power over your own behavior. It is just the result of that personality. You are trapped in a life you cannot change. It is beyond sad. It is tragic. Like being a puppet with the personality your strings.

Fortunately, this belief is in fact false.

Personality is a fluid concept at best. It is merely a collection of tendencies that stem from a survival adaptation. In the wild, it is safer to act in ways that you acted in the past. Because any behavior that does not get you killed is good. Thus your unconscious remembers how you behave in every situation. Then it has a predilection for the same behavior when you encounter that situation in the future.

But it is only a predilection. If it was a fixed fact, then we would not have any free will. We would be biological robots.

You can always choose your behavior. You can always choose to behave differently than you did in the past. Differently than you ‘personality’.

But you need to take responsibility. Because this means your life is always in your power to change. You cannot blame anything or anyone else for your actions. They are your alone.

This is a heavy burden at first. But only at first. When applied, it frees you to choose your own life.

It is easier if you have someone to guide you in the process. If you’re interested, message me for more details.